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This is an incredibly important topic, one that is difficult and hard to look at directly. People are afraid of dying and perhaps more afraid of loved ones dying. Medical science and our health care system can do incredible things, but it can also overwhelm the people it is treating and their families.

This New Yorker magazine article discusses at length the idea that we as responsible people need to discuss, well ahead of any illness or disease, the qualities of life that are important to us. Unless we face our own ends now, when they are still abstract and manageable, we won’t (most likely) be able to overcome the fear, uncertainty, and doubt that will arise when we are suddenly faced with them later; and the lack of preparedness will be hugely costly in terms of emotional suffering for all involved later.

It is not an easy read, not one that will leave you feeling upbeat or satisfied. But it is a vitally important one, and one I recommend you all take the time to complete.

Over the years I have joined and left a number of high-volume mail lists and I’ve finally come up with a set of guidelines that help me to consume the entries that interest me while not getting lost in the sea of entries offered.

By high-volume I mean something like the Android Developers Google Group. Yesterday this mail list generated 207 messages in my inbox. Two-hundred-and-seven. If you don’t cull that flow frequently and effectively you’ll have 800 or thousand messages waiting for you.

So in no particular order here are the things I do to pare the list down.

No replies – no read

Unfortunately many posting to these technical mailing lists go unanswered. Either the subject isn’t descriptive enough, or the message itself is lacking in specificity. Lots of these are along the lines of “I’m getting an error, please help.” Only without proper spelling, grammar, or punctuation.

As I am a beginner at Android development I skip the unanswered messages as there is nothing there for me to learn.

Only replies are from original poster – no read

There are some posters who repeated refresh their original posting. A majority of these are people who keep pestering the group wanting to know why no one is answering their particular question. A few are people considerate enough to post a solution that they found elsewhere. I tend to skip these largely due to the increasing shrill “why aren’t you answering my question” replies.

Reply thread includes message from that “one guy” – no read

All mailing lists (at least all technical mailing lists) have a guy who snipes at everyone and everything. They complain about top-posting, or repeating the entire message instead of just the portion being responded to. Often then deride the original poster for not having availed themselves of Google or online forums or tea leaves or something. These “get-off-my-lawn” types do occasionally answer a question, but I tend to skip threads with a response from them as the holier-than-thou attitude gets old fast.

Messages include responses from the two or three gurus on the list – read

A good mailing list will include a maven or two, and perhaps a guru. These people take the time to answer questions completely, often siting sources or reference material. I learn a lot from these threads and enjoy reading them. Bonus points for a thread that attracts more than one guru provided answer.

The topic intrigues me – read

A well-written subject line can be enough to entice me to open the thread and follow it to its conclusion. Sometimes even if “that guy” is a responder. And as I run into my own issues, finding a thread that addresses it is always welcome.

When all else fails, mark all as read

These guidelines help me to triage the torrent of incoming messages from high activity groups. Even with a fairly ruthless application of these rules I sometimes end up declaring email bankruptcy and marking all the messages as read so I can start over.

Tags: email, mail lists

1. So, you got a new phone. What is it again?

An HTC Droid Incredible through Verizon.

2. Looks pretty cool. What operating system does it run?

Android 2.1 (“Eclair”) plus HTC Sense. Android 2.1  is the operating system, and Sense is an extra user interface layer added by HTC. The native Android UI is a bit inconsistent across the OS and Sense cleans that up a bit.

Rumor has it that I’ll get the FroYo, Android 2.2 update later this year.

3. Why an Android phone, why not an iPhone?

While I’ve wanted an iPhone since they day they were announced three and a half years ago, the right set of circumstances to justify owning one never happened. For the last 18 months we lived in worked in Manhattan where AT&T doesn’t provide 3G service. Buying a 3G phone, i.e., an iPhone, here meant existing on the Edge data network when out of range of WiFi. Also, there are reports of dropped calls amongst my iPhone owning friends here in town.

If Apple had opened up the phone to other carriers I would have had a much tougher decision to make, but without 3G I went with Android.

4. What did you give up to gain 3G data?

Nothing. All the use cases I had for a smartphone work wonderfully on the Incredible. In many cases I’m using software from the same producers as I would be using had I bought an iPhone.

5. What are your smartphone “use cases?”

I wanted several things: to read eBooks (specifically using eReader.com as I have 159 titles from them), to access email, to have my calendar, to do some Internet browsing, to access and read PDF files, to have a pocket sized GPS device with navigation, and to have a decent pocket sized camera.

There are Android applications for all these functions and more.

6. What are some of your favorite applications?

I am continually wowed by Google Sky Maps. It and other augmented reality applications are stunning to see and use. As a musician I am enjoying getting to use Cleartune’s excellent chromatic tuner application. It provides, among many other features, tuning in true 5ths as opposed to equal temperament 5ths, useful for a cello. And, while I am not a gamer by any stretch of the word, I am enjoying Air Control, where you act as the control tower trying to land as many planes as possible.

7. If there is something about your phone or Android you don’t like, what is it?

A couple of the included HTC Sense widgets aren’t as full featured as they could be. The default weather application is extremely limited in the locations you can display. Unless your phone as been to a place, and you’ve deliberately added it, you likely can’t see the weather there. For example, I want to add Decatur IL where my father lives. Can’t do it. I can add Chicago, but not St. Louis. There are other weather widgets, but those aren’t skinned with the Sense look-and-feel.

The alarm clock once it has been snoozed can’t be turned off. You either wait the 10 minutes and turn it off when it sounds again, or disable the repeating alarm altogether.

Physically the phone is very nice. Most of the reviews I’ve read about the Incredible complain about the joystick. (A) you don’t really need it, and (B) using it to take pictures is fiddly. I would agree with both of those statements.

8. What surprised you most about the phone?

That I can easily develop and deploy applications for it. In a few hours time (after reading the excellent “Hello, Android” book from Pragmatic Programmers) I was able to create a simple application that displays information about your current WiFi connection and DHCP assigned IP address. I could have done this on an iPhone too, but not as quickly and easily as I already know Java and XML, I would have to learn Objective-C.  And I can share my application with any other Android user without going through a centralized application repository.

9. Should I get an Android too?

Rather than ask which phone you should get, make a list of the top 5 things you expect to use the phone for, and then look at the phones that will best enable those uses. Smartphones are expensive and the data plans are costly as well. Buying a phone just to have it is a poor idea, especially in light of the extremely high early termination fees.

10. What do you think the iPhone is better at than Android?

Since Apple manufactures and controls the entire iPhone experience, from hardware (including the CPU) to software, the overall experience is perhaps better integrated. To my way of thinking Apple is all about selling experience rather than any one particular device. The cellphone carriers are only interested in getting you to sign a contract. Android, and other smartphones, by their very nature will always have a more piecemeal feel to them.

Tags: android, cellphone, smartphone, verizon

Usually when Apple pushes out an operating system update I wait a day or so to see if there are any reports of major problems or gotchas, and then I update my system. The release of 10.6.4 recently was no different. After waiting a day I saved all my work, closed all my running applications and started Software Update.

For the first time in the more than seven years I’ve been running Mac OS X the update failed. It very nicely recovered and rebooted me to 10.6.3. At first I thought the download must have been corrupted so I tried it a second time, with the same unsatisfying result.

Over the weekend I downloaded outside of Software Update the package and tried to install it. Still no luck. This evening I hunted up the combination update package and tried it with no success. I ran Disk Utilities to verify the disk and correct the permissions, and tried the combo updater again. Failed.

Searching for “10.6.4 update fails” on Google lead me to this Apple forum thread, which talks about SmartBoard software as being the potential culprit. Just a couple of weeks ago we installed two SmartBoards at work and I installed the drivers and application on my laptop so I could interact with the boards. The Apple forum linked to a thread at Smart Technologies that explained the issue and how to resolve it.

It seems in a fit of incredibly poor software citizenship, the Smart installer sets a limit on the number of open files – for the entire operating system and all programs running on it. This file handle limit not only prevented my update from running, it caused me to get some fairly vague messages that had me thinking something was corrupted.

Once I deleted the /etc/launchd.conf file that Smart Technologies saw fit to spam onto my computer the update ran smoothly and completed without a hitch.

Bad Smart Technologies, bad!

Tags: apple, os x, smartboard

In order to enable Internet access while we are in Germany without having to rely upon Internet cafés or access to (usually per-per-use) WiFi, Sibylle and I invested 50 € in a Tchibo Internet Stick. Tchibo is nominally a coffee company, selling fresh ground beans and other coffee related items. However they also sell some small electronics including a USB based mobile modem.

Sibylle purchased the device in March when she was in Germany and successfully used it for a week to access the Internet. The only glitch she experienced was the registration process. Unless you follow the included instructions carefully and register your device within the first 24-hours of use, the time you purchased reverts to a by-the-hour billing plan. This meant that she used up  20 € in a day. By completing the registration that same 20 € pays for one month of “flat rate” service. Sibylle was able to speak to a helpful service representative at Tchibo and convert the plan from hourly to the flat rate plan so the 20 € wasn’t lost. More on Tchibo’s service representatives in a minute.

On our current trip we both are here with a total of three Internet capable devices: my MacBook Pro, her HP laptop, and her iPod Touch. Our planning was to connect one of the laptops to the Internet via the Tchibo and share that connection for the other two. Our first stop in Stuttgart after arriving with the Tchibo store at the Stadtmitte stop on the S-Bahn. For 20 € we bought a new month’s worth of service. At a nearby Starbucks we plugged in and added the new time only to gain no access. Tired and frustrated we packed up and made our way to Leutenbach where we tried again. This time everything worked. Our guess is that adding additional time takes a while to register and trickle down to the account.

I was unsuccessful in sharing the connection from her Vista machine. The various sites I looked at had detailed instructions that never quite lined up with the dialogs I was seeing. Abandoning that idea I next tried to use the Tchibo on my MacBook Pro. While the device mounted and showed a package, I wasn’t able to run the package successfully. After a night’s sleep we called the service number to ask for help.

In the United States we are used to hearing the phrase “this call may be recorded for quality assurance purposes” and consequently don’t really stop to think about what that means. While I don’t speak Germany, Sibylle assures me that no such phrase is uttered when you call Tchibo. I lost track of how many times I called, perhaps 8? 10? Several calls I ended in frustration as the person I reached spoke no English as wasn’t willing to transfer me to someone else. One suggested in very broken English that I needed to call the hotline, which is how I ended up talking to him in the first place.

Two of the calls resulted in English speakers, and between them I managed to figure out how to get things working.

Step One: Get the Installer

The Tchibo Internet Stick, or Surf Stick, is really from O2, so searching the Internet for “Tchibo” and Mac OS X don’t really help. Tchibo has no drivers or installers on their site either. You have to go to the O2 site to find the installer necessary. Here’s the page where I got the installer for Mac OS X 10.6:

http://portal.o2online.de/nw/support/downloads/software/surfsticks/loopsurfstick/loop-surfstick.html

Step Two: Run the Installer

Once the download competes and has been unzipped, you need to attach the Tchibo USB device to the Mac before running the installer – it contains the package the installer actually installs. With the USB plugged in run the installer and follow the prompts. My installer included an English language PDF complete with screen shots showing the installation process. When it asks for the package to install, point to the “Mobil Provider” file on the USB device.

After the install completes you will see two new devices added to System Preferences under the Network preference pane.

Step Three: Configure and Run

Select the HUAWEI Modem listed on the Network preference pane and set the phone number to be “*99#” (without the quotes). That’s star-nine-nine-hash. Leave the account name and password blank.

Next go to your Applications folder and run the “Mobil Partner” application located in the “Mobil Partner” folder. This application will ask for your PIN number, which should be on the plastic card where you punched out the SIM installed in the USB stick.

I was told that the APN or access point name was “webmobil1″ (no quotes) but I was never asked for that nor did I have to enter it anywhere. I suspect that since our Tchibo was originally installed and configured on a Windows machine that the SIM already knew the access point information.

Step Four: Share and Enjoy

Once the Tchibo Mobil Partner application is running you should be online. If you check the “show modem status in menu bar” option on the HUAWEI configure in System Preferences, you’ll be able to see your connection time at a glance.

From the Sharing preference pane you can opt to share your connection via Ethernet or Wifi. I was able to share our connection via Wifi and everything worked on both computers. It’s not the fasted connection in the world, but it is enough for email and web browsing.

Tags: germany, internet, tchibo

Shortly before 4 pm this afternoon I became the proud owner of a receipt for a HTC Incredible from Verizon. The actual device will ship in about 2 1/2 weeks on June 11th. Until then I’ll have to amuse myself with pictures online and the Android Emulator.

What I need now is an Android countdown widget. Oh, and Android phone to run it.

Tags: android, htc, incredible

When Apple started the original “Switchers” ads on television I desperately wanted to get an Apple PowerBook as my computer. Its elegant form combined with the Aqua user interface and Mac OS X seemed like an unbeatable combination to me. I haunted eBay and Amazon auctions (remember Amazon Auctions?) trying to find a good used machine. Unfortunately most of the offerings were scams, each time I managed to win an auction the seller always had some reason why they couldn’t use an escrow service or otherwise complete the sale.

In January 2003 I finally bought my first Apple laptop,  a Titanium PowerBook G4, a machine I used on a daily basis until this past October when I upgraded to a new Unibody MacBook Pro. The entire Apple experience has been very satisfying for me; the applications, the fit and finish of the operating system, the community around Apple and their products. I am an Apple fanboy.

When Steve Jobs announced the iPhone three and a half years ago I was utterly taken with the device. That I could have in the palm of my hand a miniaturized computer was astounding, that it looked beautiful and performed fantastically was unbelievable.

I’ve never owned an iPhone however, at first because I was in the middle of my 2-year contract, and later due to not feeling like I could afford the extra $30 a month on a data plan. This spring, however I felt like the time for waiting and excuses was over – I was ready to get the new iPhone as soon as it was announced and available.

There were some concerns however. We live in Manhattan Kansas, which doesn’t have 3G support from AT&T yet. There are rumors that 3G support is coming “later this year,” but those rumors are now more than a year old. Even if I were to buy a new 4G iPhone after its release this summer, I would only be able to connect at Edge speeds whenever I was out of WiFi range. And people I know in town with the 3GS model complain about every call being dropped. As I only have a cellphone (no land line) I need reliability; dropped calls would be more than a nuisance, they would be unacceptable.

And I admit I have some concerns about the walled garden that Apple is building around their flagship product. I fully support Apple’s desire to protect themselves from some of the platform fragmentation issues and 3rd-party dependencies that would come with a more open platform, however, I think their heavy handiness in this pursuit will eventually cost them.

Over the past week or so I have been considering getting an Android based smartphone. Until a couple of days ago I knew very little about Android or the handsets that incorporated it, but I knew there was a large, rabidly supportive community growing around these devices. Through several of the people I follow on Twitter I tracked the announcements from Google’s IO conference this past week, including the 2.2 release of Android. As a result I have become very intrigued by the possibility of an Android phone.

Like many people my desire for a smartphone centers around convergence, I want a single device to replace three devices today: my Palm m515, my 5th generation iPod, and my Sony-Ericcson w600i cellphone. Since 1997 I have owned four Palm handhelds, starting with a Pilot and currently with a Palm m515. The m515 works beautifully but the Palm software hasn’t been updated in eons, and the synchronization and charging process is clunky. My aging iPod, stashed away in the armrest of our Honda Insight where it provides music through the car’s auxiliary channel, is over four years old now and has about an hour of battery life once unplugged. And my cellphone, while serviceable and extremely rugged, is just a phone.

I am not overly attracted to the tens of thousands of apps that are available for the iPhone. My use cases are few and rather specific. I want to read eBooks (I have over 200 eReader titles through my Palm), I want to send/receive SMS text messages, I want to interact with Twitter, I want to do email, web browsing, and perhaps instant message chat. I would make good use of maps and navigation tools, and I would love to have a GPS for tracking bicycle rides and neighborhood walks. Through my cello playing I have become aware of a couple of music related applications I would like to have, a chromatic tuner and a metronome.

Becoming more aware of the Android OS made me wonder if it was worth looking into as an alternative to an iPhone. Certainly several of the HTC designs were beautiful, and with Verizon as the provider I would have 3G service in Manhattan on day 1. Telling myself that I was only going to look and see, I stopped by the Verizon store yesterday and asked to see the HTC Incredible. Having visited a Verizon reseller on Friday who didn’t have even a mock up of the Incredible I figured I was safe. Ha. They not only had an Incredible, it was a live phone that I could interact with.

There are any number of lengthy reviews online that explore the HTC Incredible and its features in depth, so I won’t do that here. However I will say that I was extremely impressed. I think HTC has raised the bar on Apple and produced a phone that is every bit as capable, as beautiful, and as versatile as the iPhone. Moreover, give the lack of AT&T 3G coverage where I live and work, the Verizon phone is better.

Since leaving the Verizon store I have confirmed that my favorite eBook application is available for Android, as is the Twitter application I like. The chromatic tuner application for iPhone is also available for Android. The HTC web browser is webkit based, and since Android comes from Google, Gmail and Google Calendar are tightly integrated as well. As a bonus the beautifully done and highly functional chromatic tuner application for iPhone is also available for Android. In short I can find no compelling reason to not get an HTC Incredible instead of an iPhone. And I can find at least one reason to not get the iPhone (no 3G service).

I’ve spent the last 24 hours talking about every aspect of these choices with Sibylle, including comments about how wonderful it is to have a choice and to go through the angst of deciding. In the end there is only one thing that might make me regret choosing the HTC – an announcement in early June from Apple that the new iPhone will be available through Verizon. I say might because now that I’ve played with the Incredible and read reviews of the phone, the Android OS, and the HTC Sense extension, I have to say that presented with both an iPhone 4g and a HTC Incredible with equal service offerings I would probably choose the HTC.

I haven’t decided whether I should order an Incredible today, and gamble that Apple won’t announce a Verizon contract in two weeks at the World Wide Developer Convention (WWDC), or whether I should wait until after the WWDC keynote to make my choice. Everything I’ve read leads me to believe that Apple will extend their relationship with AT&T for at least six more months. I think AT&T is offering the $15 per month, no contract required 3G service on the iPad as a stay against Apple switching to another carrier. But I also recognize the goodwill people feel toward Apple is being harmed by the relationship with AT&T, and that unless AT&T vastly improves their network, and fulfills the promise of tethering, that Apple will start to pay a price for not switching.

Mostly I guess my hesitation is giving up the dream of owning an iPhone. I am disappointed that there is no 3G service where I live, and I am increasingly disheartened by Apple’s insular stance on some issues. The Verizon store is open this afternoon from noon until 6 pm. Who knows what will happen.

Tags: android, apple, att, htc, iphone, verizon

01. I started playing violoncello six months ago.

02. I have only seen or talked to my brother twice in four years.

03. I have been to Germany twice so far this year.

04. So far this year I have read 36 books.

05. After a 15 year hiatus I have started riding my bicycle again this year.

06. I commute 8 minutes (each way) to work when driving.

07. I commute 20 minutes (each way) to work when bicycling.

08. Twenty-seven years after I completed my Bachelor’s degree I am starting a Master’s degree.

09. Every year it takes longer and longer to write these lists. This year’s was started on April 12th.

10. I now own three bicycles.

11. Our car is a hybrid and we average about 40 ~ 42 mpg.

12. If I live to be 98 I am now middle aged.

13. Ever since the Bicentennial I have wanted to live to see the Tricentennial.

14. I’ll be 116 years old on July 4, 2076

15. My cello repertoire (including single string, five-note pieces) is 35 pieces now.

16. This web site, which I created, is now over 14 years old.

17. In addition to corn I now eat cooked carrots. My mother would be so proud.

18. I have had the same cell phone for over 4 years.

19. I have had nine jobs since graduation from college.

20. After Illinois, I have lived the longest in Kansas.

21. I have, or contribute to, six web sites.

21. I have ten email addresses.

22. I can now read music.

23. I still haven’t been to Alabama.

24. Our household has 5 laptops, 4 desktops and one iPod Touch.

25. The Winne-the-Pooh stories are still my favorite childhood books.

26. I can count to twenty in three languages.

27. I can count to one hundred in two languages.

28. I don’t know how high I can count in my cradle language.

29. By the end of this calendar year, I will have traveled outside of the United States ten times.

30. This calendar year alone, I will travel outside the US three times.

31. 18 months after having Lasik surgery on my eyes, I required trifocal glasses to see properly.

32.  My favorite new sandwich at Panera is their Cuban – without the pickles, please.

33. I believe that there is intelligent life elsewhere in the universe.

34. I prefer Twitter to Facebook.

35. I am a “see you later” person. As opposed to a “I’ll be in touch” or “It’s been nice talking to you” person.

36. The older I get the spicier I like my food.

37. I can now say things like “Twenty-five years ago…” and have it mean a period of time when I was an adult.

38. I have read Neal Stephenson’s Cryptonomicon once every year since it was publish in 1999.

39. I don’t remember my dreams but I do remember Christmas when I was two and a half.

40. I have studied, and hold rank in, two martial arts.

41. I am the fifth generation in a row in my family to be married twice.

42. My middle name, Hanford, is my great-grandfather’s middle name. And his father’s given name.

43. After losing 57 pounds 3 years ago, I’ve regained 15.

44. I’ve had my left earlobe pierced twice.

45. I’ve had 5 surgeries (involving a scalpel) and 6 procedures (involving an endoscope).

46. The song Suite Judy Blue Eyes always reminds me of summer and the swimming pool.

47. I prefer Coca-cola and Macs to Pepsi and Windows.

48. I’ve had a beard since 1998.

49. Today I am seventeen thousand eight hundred and ninety seven days old.

Tags: birthday

In the summer of 2006 I joined a kendo club in Overland Park, partly out of a long standing interest in kendo and partly out of a need to workout and lose some weight. In early August I pulled a groin muscle in my left leg. Badly. Well, the original injury wasn’t that bad perhaps, but I foolishly tried to workout anyway and ended up with a nasty pull.

The resulting limp was so bad that I developed some compensation injuries elsewhere. The worst of these was in my lower back. The pain was unlike anything I had felt before. One night it was so intense that not only did it wake me up, I could move – I was unable to roll over or get out bed.

A long sequence of events followed culminating in a visit to my regular physician. She ordered a set of x-rays and pronounced me as having severe degenerative disk disease or arthritis. We all lose some height as we age as the disks in our spines compress and collapse with age, this is known as degenerative disk disease even though it isn’t really a disease. Severe just means it happens sooner than normal or in a more accelerated fashion.

A month or so of physical therapy followed leaving me with a set of about 15 stretching and strengthening exercises to perform on a daily basis. I followed the prescribed routine for about a year, laying on my yoga pad nightly, and my back, on the whole, was much better.

However, having words like “severe” and “arthritis” banded about with regards to ones back make you timid about lifting and worrisome about anything that might cause you pain. An ill-considered lower back massage that left me on the floor in agony, and a brief muscle spasm for no apparent reason one other time, have left me cautious around my back.

On Friday last week I saw a new chiropractor, Dr. Mike. After hearing my story he took a couple of x-rays of my lower back and then went over them with me. The spacing between my lumbar vertebrae all look uniform and good. There are one or two small bone spur indications, but no evidence of severe anything, much less degenerative disk disease.

Having lived through two or three really bad episodes of lower back pain I know that I need to be careful about my back, but hearing, and seeing, that my back is mechanically in better shape than I previously thought was nice. My hope is that once the chiropractor gets me tuned up that the bicycle riding and walking we do will help to keep my properly aligned .

Tags: chiropractic

Recently I was profiled and, as a result, treated differently as I as leaving Walmart.

I’m an introvert and as such do not readily engage with people I don’t know. Retailers who employ greeters to say something to every person who enters or leaves the store put those of us who are not wired for comfortable social interaction on the spot.

Typically when I enter Walmart I try to avoid having to interact with the greeter. If there are other people entering at the same time I will position them between myself and the forced cheerfulness of the “Welcome to Walmart!” The situation at Best Buy is more egregious as their greeter is basically behind you once you are fully in the store and his or her greeting forces you to stop and turn around to acknowledge it. Walking through that greeting always makes my skin prickle – in spite of being introverted I have been socialized to respond when talked to. Couple the resulting on-the-spot awkwardness with the frenetic energy in Best Buy and you understand why I only rarely venture into the store any more.

I digress.

After going to Walmart for a couple items late one evening recently, I was headed toward the exit when the greeting wished me a good evening. I wasn’t in a social mood, and really didn’t want to have to accept another well-meaning but intrusive verbal interaction with a stranger. So I didn’t even look at the greeter. Instantly she shot off her stool and intercepted me at the door. Her demeanor had changed from were-all-friends-here to anger and suspicion. She demanded to see my receipt, asking the question so fast it came out as, “Ineedtoseeyourreceipt!” I had to ask her to repeat herself, and she even more emphatically said, “I NEED TO SEE YOU RECEIPT.” Her manner was aggressive and her entire attitude was accusatory.

I showed her the receipt for the mild, orange juice and cat food and kitty litter I had bought and paid for at the register immediately in front of her greeter post, and she made a big show of verifying that all four items in my cart were on the receipt. After discovering that my lack of response to her “Good evening” didn’t mean that I was steal the Walmart crown jewels, she thrust the receipt back and me and said “Okay.”

Just because I choose not to talk to people, just because I am not social, just because it was late and I was tired and grumpy, just because I didn’t act in the prescribed Walmart way, I was profiled as being suspicious and potentially up to no good.

While I think that proper behavioral profiling performed by well trained professionals may be the best way to determine if someone is actively engaged in activity they shouldn’t be doing, I think that improper understanding of human traits and actions results in misunderstandings like the one I experienced at Walmart while buying cat litter. My experience is nothing compared to what anyone who appears different has already experienced. My experience at Walmart is nothing compared to what our government has subjected millions of travelers and visitors to our country to in the years since 2001.

But, my experience is a cautionary tale that merely telling everyone to be suspicious and to report unusual behavior isn’t enough and isn’t right.

Tags: introvert, profiling