April 18, 2006
After twenty-seven weeks and one day I finally couldn't go through the motions any more. Usually on a week day I wake up between 4:30 and 5:00 am without using an alarm clock. Today I didn't wake up until nearly 7:00 am. After taking a shower and getting dressed for work I just couldn't bring myself to leave the apartment. I fiddled around with little chores and eventually managed to get my things out to the car. Once I did leave I only managed to get to the highway before turning around and heading back home.
I need a day for me. A day when I am "supposed" to do one thing but let myself not do anything. Weekends are nice and all, but allowing myself to stay home on a Tuesday for no reason other than I don't want to go to work is good medicine. Call it a mental health day. Call it playing hooky. Call it whatever you want; I needed a day where I blew off responsibilities and just said FTW.
The coming weeks and months are going to be difficult, professionally, personally, spiritually, and emotionally. Today is a bit of in-country R&R before the next big offensive.